When we were first married, Gary did not understand the concept that sometimes wives just need a listening ear, not necessarily a solution. And, as a newlywed, I was insecure about my body, wondering if Gary would be happier if I were thinner. So I often complained about the size of my thighs. Needless to say, Gary found a solution.
He was so excited one day as he presented me a package. When I opened it, I didn’t know whether to laugh or cry, to hit him or to… really hit him! Inside was a pair of thick, clear plastic shorts that Gary found in an advertisement in the Sunday paper inserts. You were supposed to put these shorts on and run in place and they were guaranteed to knock inches off your hips and thighs…..or your money back! But here is the kicker…you had to hook it up to the hose of a vacuum sweeper and turn it on while you jog in place. It was supposed to suck out the sweat!
As I look back, I can’t believe I actually tried it. It must have been the newlywed in me. Anyway, Gary got his money back, and I learned that our love was not based on how much I weighed.
Oh, and his black eye healed over time.
hee hee! love this one mom. it's so cool - you're finally getting these stories down!
ReplyDeleteOH MY WORD. That is hysterical. what a STRANGE product. i think i need one for my stomach. :)
ReplyDeletei'm glad to see you've started a blog, too. i never thought i'd have one, either, but i turns out to be a good scrapbooking tool for someone who hates to scrapbook. :)
Marla,
ReplyDeleteI laughed out loud on this one! You are doing a wonderful job writing. I have always loved the Bill story too. And I too remember your mom's quaint little shop. Here's to the "good ole days"!
Love you and keep writing!